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 Tracers, action I've added.

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Anthony



Posts : 1
Join date : 2011-06-14

PostSubject: Tracers, action I've added.   Mon Jun 20, 2011 7:59 pm

I'm kind of disappointed. Should have completed this already. Between being busy and being ill, I guess I did what I could. 25 pages so far, I estimate about 32-35 as things stand with this plot. You know, it really doesn't feel like a Pilot. More like an ep.2 or ep.3. Needs more suspense, or mystery, or action. The climax just isn't. That's cut off on purpose. Just my opinion.
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gregrburch
Supreme Commander
Supreme Commander


Posts : 63
Join date : 2010-10-23
Age : 38
Location : Missoula

PostSubject: Re: Tracers, action I've added.   Mon Jun 20, 2011 9:23 pm




EXT. PARK - DAY

The scene opens up in a park on a sunny, spring, day.
There is a small group of three playing with a frisbee.
They are tossing it back and forth amongst themselves and
laughing. There is a man jogging along an asphalt trail
around from bottom to left. To the right, we can see a
small family having a picnic on a blanket. There are
children running around them and playing. To the left of
the picnickers, is Lennie practicing Tai-Chi. She is
wearing a tank-top and Yoga pants. There are various
other people of non importance. Happy people, secure and
serene.

A QUICK SNAP TO BLACK
WHICH MIMICS AN EYE
BLINKING

ED
(While the screen is black)
Five



INT. BOOKSTORE - EVENING

A young man and girl are standing in line together at a
local bookstore. They are dressed normally for their age
and appear to know each other. He is farther back from
view to the right and she is nearer, to the bottom left.
The line is only a couple of people deep.

The young girl is carrying a basket with some supplies in
it, and a book about Psychology. The young man stands
while looking around. He's holding a couple of college
textbook-sized books, and one about pictures of
Singapore. He only intermittently glances in the
direction of the girl as he speaks.

YOUNG MAN
Craziest thing... was watching this
infomercial the other night. Guy was
babbling on about mind-readers.

The young girl actually turns and looks at the young
man's face as she speaks. We now move into a frontal
view.

YOUNG GIRL
Oh, right, right. Did he sound like he
needed better meds?

The young man looks surprised a little as he thinks back
on the infomercial.

YOUNG MAN
No, honestly, he sounded like he could
convince a lot of people.

The young man turns to his left to look straight into her
eyes.

YOUNG MAN (CONT'D)
Really though. He was all on about how
telepaths are basically what homo sapiens
were to the Neanderthals, and they're
gonna breed us out of existence.



INT. A TV - EVENING

All we see is a tv. The infomercial man is on.

INFOMERCIAL MAN
Here's how to order!

A QUICK SNAP TO BLACK
WHICH MIMICS AN EYE
BLINKING

ED
(While the screen is black)
Four



EXT. PLAYGROUND - DAY

Scene opens at a park with a playground. The weather is
nice and sunny There is a basketball court with children
playing. We can hear them yelling and having fun in the
background. On a patch of grass left of the basketball
court, is a granite chess board with two people talking
to each other. There is a nice tree slightly
overshadowing them from the left. The two men are
normally dressed and not playing chess. The man on the
left is moving both of his hands above the granite chess
board as he speaks to the other.

MAN ON THE LEFT
(Agitated)
Homeless dude on the street was gettin'
up all in my grille, you feel me?

The man on the right is leaning back a bit away from us.
He has a relaxed and chilled demeanor. He is nodding his
head as he speaks.

MAN ON THE RIGHT
Right on, right on. How'd you deal with
it?

The man on the left leans back and turns his head to the
right towards us, takes a deep breath, and leans back in
towards the man on the left.

MAN ON THE LEFT
Dude kept saying he could see inside my
head. That the CIA or some shit did
something to him.

The man on the right looks surprised and starts to laugh
a little. He speaks with bewilderment in his voice and
stretches this word out in the middle.

MAN ON THE RIGHT
(dooood)
Dude.

The man on the left puts both his hands on the edges of
the granite chessboard and leans in towards the other man
before he speaks.

MAN ON THE LEFT
(In a quieter yet stressed
tone)
Straight up freaky man.

The man on the left then leans back into his seat.

MAN ON THE LEFT (CONT'D)
His eyes were all buggin' out at me and
shit.

A QUICK SNAP TO BLACK
WHICH MIMICS AN EYE
BLINKING

ED
(While the screen is black)
Three



INT. DOCTOR'S OFFICE - AFTERNOON

A basic doctor's office. To the right sits an upset man
upon an examination table. He is facing left towards a
female physician. Though facing us, her back is mostly
facing the patient. She is glancing back and forth
between him and an x-ray lightbox mounted on the wall to
the far left. She pulls one of the x-rays off the
lightbox. It is of the patient's head.

PATIENT
(Very upset)
What in the hell do you mean there's
nothing wrong with me?

The doctor turns towards him and steps in with the x-ray
in her right hand. The patient shouts at her.

PATIENT (CONT'D)
(Shouts)
I can't get my roommate's thoughts out of
my head!

The doctor's eyebrows raise in surprise as he shouts. She
tries to speak at him in a professional, yet firm manner.

DOCTOR
Sir, the x-ray shows no abnormalities
anywhere in your cranium, frontal lobe,
or any other suspected telepathic
location.

The patient just stares at her, anger growing over his
face.

DOCTOR (CONT'D)
(Concerned)
I think your issues are psychological.
Have you considered professional mental
help?

The patient cocks his head to the side away from us while
still staring at her. Then he shouts hysterically at her.

PATIENT
Shrink ain't gonna do shit! Tried that
for years, sister.

The doctor is still looking intently at the man. The
patient leans in while clenching his teeth.

PATIENT (CONT'D)
(Frustrated)
All the drugs do is sap me of my strength
till there ain't nothin' left to sap.

The doctor fidgets a little. She is noticeably getting
nervous. As she speaks, the man is rubbing his face with
both palms.

DOCTOR
I can refer you to some very capable
colleagues.

The patient makes a whiny sigh and removes his hands from
his face and holds onto the edge of the table. He rocks
back and forth a little. Without looking at the doctor he
rambles.

PATIENT
Besides, the book of Revelations said
gifts like this are just proof the Lord
is coming back.

The Patient's eyes get very wide, and come into a dead
stare. He's looking through the doctor now.

PATIENT (CONT'D)
I seen it myself with my own eyes.

A QUICK SNAP TO BLACK
WHICH MIMICS AN EYE
BLINKING

ED
(While the screen is black)
Two



INT. BANK - MORNING

A man walks into a local bank. Its an average bank with
tellers at the back, and cubicles to the right of the
entrance. The man is dressed nicely in business attire.
He has a shiny gold tie clip. But otherwise nothing about
him stands out. He walks over to a counter and takes out
a withdrawal slip from a holder. He proceeds to fill it
out quickly. When he finishes, he takes the note up to
the first available teller. Its a woman in her mid
thirties. Rather plain, but nicely dressed. She smiles at
him as he approaches. The man hands her the slip. The
teller takes it and looks down at it.

TELLER
Excuse me, sir. For a withdrawal of this
size I'll have to ask to see some I.D.

The man fidgets around and slaps his pockets. He puts a
hand in each one, pulls them out, and sticks his right
hand into his coat.

CUSTOMER
(Quickly)
I'm so sorry!

CUSTOMER (CONT'D)
... Ma'am. But I left it at home. I can
give you all of my personal information
though.

A half-faced smirk appears on the teller's right side.
Her brows arch a bit. The man's voice turns into a plea.

CUSTOMER (CONT'D)
Social Security number, birth date, all
that good stuff?

The teller shakes her head at him.

TELLER
It's
(Pause)
Well, highly unusual.

The man looks away. Then back at her. A very wide smile
adorns his face as he looks at her for a few seconds. The
teller isn't sure what to make of it. She's a bit
startled and confused.

CUSTOMER
And I appreciate it! But hey, this smile
should tell you that you can trust me!
Smiles are the next best thing to being
able to read my mind, right?

The teller looks hesitant at first. Then lets out a sigh
like noise indicative of a 'Fine'. The teller looks down
at the monitor. From just behind the teller's head we can
see all of the man's account information. There is a line
which reads secret question. In that line is the word
'Stargate'. As the teller is reading it, the man's face
changes slightly. From a wide smile to an 'I got ya'
grin.

TELLER
What's your secret password?

The man looks her dead in the eyes and leans in. He puts
his left hand across and over his mouth to whisper at
her. We can see the back of his hand and his mouth.

CUSTOMER
Stargate

The teller raises a brow.

TELLER
Huh?

The man is still smiling.

CUSTOMER
(In a like-duh tone)
Like the movie?

After a short pause where the answer is registering in
her mind.

TELLER
One moment please.

She slides open a drawer and counts out money using a
calculator. When she finishes, she prints out receipt,
closes the drawer, and hands both the receipt and the
pile of cash to the man. He winks at her and happily
takes them both with his right hand and turns all the way
around to leave. As he is walking towards the door, he
pulls out a wallet from his left pocket and sticks the
money and receipt inside. As walks through the threshold
he swings the doors open far, looks into the camera, and
smiles.

A QUICK SNAP TO BLACK
WHICH MIMICS AN EYE
BLINKING



EXT. PARK - CONTINUOUS

Ed is sitting invisibly on a park bench. He is dressed in
a track suit and sitting ramrod straight. He is staring
straight ahead with a confused and struggling look. It is
apparent by his demeanor that he may be suffering from
mild mental difficulties.

ED
One

Ed stands up from his bench and nervously approaches a
woman as she jogs towards him along a nearby path. He
moves in her direction while not really looking at her.
His head is always moving about separately from his eyes.
Within a few steps, he get close enough to the woman for
her to notice him. As Ed speaks to her, he moves his body
into alignment and focuses his attention at her.

ED (CONT'D)
(Casually)
So what's the good word?

The woman sees Ed and hurries past him without saying a
word. Her eyes get a bit large in discomfort over the
situation.
The corner of her right lip curls upward while she stares
straight ahead. She makes a quiet sound to herself of
disgust. Ed remains standing in place while watching her
continue down the path for a brief second before jogging
off himself in the opposite direction towards us. Ed
looks back slightly over his left shoulder towards the
woman when Lennie suddenly appears right in front of his
path.

LENNIE
Can I ask you a question?

Ed is both surprised and cautious by her. He begins to
run a little faster.

ED
Um
(Pause)
Sure

Lennie follows after Ed, she is a step or two behind him,
but is keeping up.

LENNIE
Why do you do that?

Ed scrunches up his eyebrows. He turns his head to the
left just slightly in an attempt to look at her but the
move isn't enough to do so. Speaking defensively.

ED
Do what?

Lennie pauses a bit and stares intently at him as if he
is playing with her. To Lennie, her question seemed
obvious.

LENNIE
That thing, where you ask people a
question.

Ed slows his pace and his steps become more impacted. He
is angry.

ED
(In a stressed deep voice)
You been following me?

Lennie is taken aback by his tone and tries to sound
reassuring. She waves her right hand about in a please
stop motion while shaking her head.

LENNIE
No, it's just that I've been coming here
every morning and I've noticed you doing
that.

He stops running. And Lennie follows. The two are now
standing side by side. Lennie to the left. He looks right
at her now, and they have a real face to face
conversation. Ed is still tense and apprehensive.

ED
Well, I guess you caught me. I just like
to wish people a good day.
(Pause. Then sarcastically)
Something wrong with that?

Lennie is looking challenged. She feels that Ed is toying
with her. She is playing along.

LENNIE
No, but you don't wish them a good day.

Lennie rolls her eyes at Ed.

LENNIE (CONT'D)
You ask them a question.

Ed shrugs Lennie off and shakes his head at her. He is
now beginning to sound argumentative.

ED
Same difference

Lennie is now playing ignorant. In a playful manner she
raises her pitch and throws up her arms.

LENNIE
I guess, but why ask them?

Lennie leans in towards Ed a bit and her eyes get very
serious. Her tone levels off and gets forthcoming.

LENNIE (CONT'D)
Wouldn't it be easier to just read their
mind?

Ed is shocked. He's taken aback again by this girl. He
quietly looks into her, processing what she had just
said. There is a noticeable amount of silence before Ed
speaks again.

ED
Yeah, right.
(Chuckles a bit)
I would if I could, sister, just like
anyone,

Ed takes off running again. Lennie is immediately upon
him. Chasing him insistently.

LENNIE
No, I'm serious! You're telepathic,
aren't you!?

Ed stops running and laughs at her.

ED
Listen, you've been watching too much TV.
(Heckling her)
Just buy the video from that infomercial,
OK? I'm sure it will give you all the
answers.

Just as Ed begins to turn around and jog off, Lennie
slumps down onto a nearby park bench. She is ashamed and
emotionally hurt. She begins to cry. Ed can hear her and
so he turns back with guilt. He puts his arms on his hips
and looks around frustrated. Lennie has her hands in her
palms, still crying.

ED (CONT'D)
Hey. Hey. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be
rude just there.

Ed embarrassingly looks about at all the passersby who
are curiously peeking at the crying girl. Lennie looks up
and their eyes meet. She pushes at Ed with her mind. Ed
grimaces at an invisible pain. He puts his right hand up
to his temple and leans over slightly away. He is shocked
by what just happened. It passes shortly and he realizes
that Lennie has just read him. He looks back at her
intently. Then he speaks with his mind.

ED (CONT'D)
(Voice over narration)
How long have you been able to do this?

Lennie is no longer crying. Her face is still noticeably
wet and red. She is sniffling as she talks.

LENNIE
Like, six months.

Ed regains some of his composure and stands more relaxed.
Lennie comes to the realization that Ed did not speak
aloud. She is surprised and excited.

LENNIE (CONT'D)
Wait! What?! Did you just think that? And
I could read it?

Lennie is a bit mad at Ed for lying to her. She is subtly
enraged.

LENNIE (CONT'D)
So you are telepathic!

Ed walks over to Lennie on the bench and looks down on
her seriously.

ED
Well, yeah.
(Whispers dramatically)
Try to keep it under your hat.

Lennie is very excited now. She is almost dancing in her
seat. Ed sits down beside her right, and is turned facing
her. Lennie grabs for Ed's right hand with both of hers.

LENNIE
But what? I mean, how? I mean
(Pause)
This is amazing!

Ed is looking nervous and awkward. He doesn't feel
comfortable with Lennie touching him or of this
conversation.

ED
Uh yeah. I guess so. It happens.

Lennie is a bit disappointed by Ed's reaction. With
enthusiasm in her voice, she speaks matter-of-factly to
Ed.

LENNIE
Uh, I don't know what planet you come
from, but here on Earth people can't just
read each other's minds.

Ed pulls his hand away from hers. He is a little annoyed.

ED
That doesn't seem to be stopping you.

Ed gives Lennie a smart-ass grin. He leans back
comfortably on the bench and puts his left arm up and
along the top ledge. He leans his head back and stares
upwards. Lennie is in disbelief over his attitude. She
scoots in closer to Ed, who is still not looking at her.

LENNIE
Look pal, I don't know what your trip is,
but this, power, ability, whatever you
want to call it has been driving me
crazy. Now that I've finally found
somebody else who can do this..

Lennie slides her right hand onto Ed's left thigh coyly.
It captures Ed's attention and he rolls his eyes over
towards her.

LENNIE (CONT'D)
...don't think I'm going to let you get
away without giving me some answers.

Ed shouts at her irritably.

ED
Answers to what?

Some people jog by and Ed follows them with his eyes
until they leave. He speaks quieter now.

ED (CONT'D)
You can tell what some people are
thinking some of the time, right?

Lennie thinks for a bit, bites her lower lip, and nods.

ED (CONT'D)
That's it. Nothing more. Get used to it
and deal with it like the rest of us.

Lennie's face brightens up with joy and intrigue.

LENNIE
You mean there are more?

Ed shifts in his place from side to side.

ED
Stands to reason.

Lennie asks quizzically like a child trying to ask their
parents what Christmas gifts Santa brought her this year.

LENNIE
How many?

Ed turns his body away from Lennie. Arms still clinging
to the edge of the bench.

ED
(Condescendingly)
How should I know? You think we're all
Facebook friends or something?

Lennie leans in farther to try and meet Ed's gaze.

LENNIE
You must have some idea. Come on pal,
work with me here.

Ed swings around to face her. Their heads are only a few
inches apart now.

ED
(Sarcastically)
You mean like the way everyone is helping
me? Sorry kid, you're on your own. Just
like the rest of us.

Lennie stands up and faces Ed. Her fists are clenched at
her sides. She is frail and intense.

LENNIE
(Shouts)
How can you be such a jerk!

Ed is checking his watch.

ED
(Smiling)
Years of practice.

Lennie is now fuming.

LENNIE
Fine. Well screw you pal. Thanks for
nothing.

Lennie turns and storms off mad. After about a step in
she crosses her arms while still walking away. Ed remains
on the bench.

ED
Hey, look, I'm sorry. Listen...

Ed gets up and chases after her. She ignores him.

ED (CONT'D)
Listen. We can't talk right now. Not
here, not about this. I've already been
out here too long. But take this.

Lennie stops walking but doesn't look at him. Ed digs
into his pockets and produces a pen. He looks around
briefly and picks up a white-ish piece of paper from the
ground. Its old and a bit dirty. He scribbles his phone
number onto it, and sticks it out for Lennie to take.

ED (CONT'D)
Call me later and we'll talk.

Lennie takes the scrap paper and puts it into her pants
pocket. Ed begins to jog away while a still angry Lennie
stands there facing the other direction. She shakes her
head a bit. Then moves forward.



INT. HOSPICE - EVENING

A young woman is walking towards us down a brightly lit
hallway. She is chewing gum and looking around with an
attitude. She is an upbeat valley brat. The kind who
blows bubbles and smacks her gum really loud when talking
to you, just to annoy you. Her name is Poppy. She arrives
at the main desk where the assistant head nurse is
standing. Poppy swallows her gum and stands at a
compromising attention. The Nurse steps over to her and
looks her up and down unimpressed. She is checking
Poppy's uniform. The nurse stops looking her over when
she gets to Poppy's name tag.

ASSISTANT NURSE
So, you're ...

Poppy smiles at her.

POPPY
Hi, I'm poppy.

The nurse looks up at her and dryly retorts.

ASSISTANT NURSE
Yes, I'm sure you are. I'm gonna need you
to listen to what I say, because this is
all important.

The nurse nods her head at Poppy in a do-you-fucking
understand-me manner. Poppy still looks cheerful.

ASSISTANT NURSE (CONT'D)
Got me?

Poppy tries to straighten up a bit more rigidly.

POPPY
(Enthusiastically)
Yes'm!

Poppy and the Nurse are walking down another hallway
towards us. Poppy is to the Nurse's left. She is looking
around at her surroundings with awe and wonder. Small
details like the door frames and wall tiles. Things one
would not focus on if they were a patient there. The
Nurse is adamantly strict when she speaks.

ASSISTANT NURSE
As I was saying.
(Pause)
We have two rules.

The nurse looks at Poppy to make sure she is paying
attention. Poppy realizes this and immediately gives her
all of it.

ASSISTANT NURSE (CONT'D)
We always do what the Head Nurse says,
without question, and we never go into
room 17.

Poppy 's head cocks to the side after hearing the number
seventeen.

POPPY
Who's the head-

Poppy is promptly interrupted by the Nurse.

ASSISTANT NURSE
You'll see her when you need to see her.

The nurse is shaking her head back and forth.

ASSISTANT NURSE (CONT'D)
You don't want to see her, if you catch
my drift, because that means you did
somethin' wrong and she's gonna have to
ream your behind.

The Nurse points to the right down a hallway while she
turns into it. Poppy follows her. The signs on the
corridor say Basement.

POPPY
Who's in room-

Poppy is again promptly interrupted by the Nurse.

ASSISTANT NURSE
Never you mind now, dearie.

The pair arrive at an opened door with lots of boxes with
manila folders and papers cluttered about. The Nurse
points at the doorway.

ASSISTANT NURSE (CONT'D)
Run along and get to work, now. We don't
want you gettin' fired on your first day.

Poppy is annoyed at not having been answered properly.
She steps inside and the Nurse leaves her. Poppy picks up
a small stack of papers and walks outside the room. She
looks out in the direction they just came from and there
is an orderly pushing an occupied body cart passed her.
The corpse is covered only with a sheet. A dried blood
stain can be seen on the side. Poppy looks a bit
frightened by it, and hurries back into the room.



EXT. CONGESTED STREET - AFTERNOON

Lennie comes out through a set of glass doors and onto a
sidewalk. There are plenty of people around. She heads
upward along the sidewalk. We hear a beeping noise and it
causes Lennie to hurry faster. She weaves in and out of
the crowd, through the people in her way. On the same
sidewalk, but moving in the opposite direction, is
Stolas. Stolas sees her through the cracks in the
shifting masses. He likes her face. His eyes squint and
he maneuvers towards her path. He strategizes about
meeting up with her. Not paying any attention at all,
Lennie rushes past him. Stolas leans in and bumps her
shoulder in a way that appeared as if he were rubbing up
on her. Stolas tries to play it off. He puts up his hand
apologetically.

STOLAS
Sorry. My bad.

Lennie glances back to give Stolas a very dirty look but
doesn't even stop, instead she picks up her pace. But
Stolas does. Stolas' eyes widen and he takes a deep
breath. Like as if someone just poured a bucket of ice
cold water on him. He sees Ed in his mind. He quickly
looks back at the woman he brushed up against.

STOLAS (CONT'D)
(To himself)
Ohhh. Eddieee.

He touches his right pointer and middle finger to the
right side of his head and then smoothly swipes his nose
with them. He smirks then begins to follow after Lennie
in a slow, lurking manner.



INT. SWANKY RESTARAUNT - AFTERNOON

The restaraunt is very busy. It appears to be lunch time.
There are plasma TVs on the walls tuned in to CNBC stock
market updates shows and other financial programming. At
a table in the back are Raine and Michelle. They are
seated across from one another and picking at their
meals. Raine is playing Angry Birds on his iPhone.
Michelle looks a bit discontent. She slaps the table
while she yells across at Raine.

MICHELLE
(Shouts)
Raine!

Raine looks up at her. Several other customers are also
curiously eyeing the scene Michelle has created. With a
normal inside voice.

MICHELLE (CONT'D)
You're playing that game again aren't
you.

Raine puts his iPhone face down onto the table. He coyly
replies.

RAINE
No, no, just checking my e-mail. Thought
Scutella might have sent a follow up on
that rumor about Ed.

A waiter comes over to their table and Michelle bats him
away with a hand.

MICHELLE
Don't you lie to me Raine. Not about
something so small.

Raine gives in with sarcasm.

RAINE
Fine, don't believe me.

Raine holds out both of his hands, palms up and stares
innocently into her eyes.

RAINE (CONT'D)
Here, see for yourself.

Michelle slaps his hands away.

MICHELLE
I see what I always see. A red bird
sailing into a stack of pigs. You're so
predictable.

Raine laughs and picks up his iPhone. He looks down at
it.

RAINE
That stings darling. You know you're the
one who's always in my thoughts.

Michelle picks up a menu from the restaraunt and opens
it. She speaks from behind the menu.

MICHELLE
More lies, Raine. I can read you like
this wine list.

RAINE
Unlikely.

Raine puts his iPhone into his jacket pocket.

RAINE (CONT'D)
There. Now you have my undivided
attention.

Michelle attempts to mimic Raine.

MICHELLE
Unlikely.

Michelle puts down the menu and smiles at Raine.

MICHELLE (CONT'D)
You were more focused when you were
playing with your phone. Now you're just
reading everyone in the room.

We get quick successive jumps from one table to the next.
Just briefly listening in on snippets of their
conversations. Couples, families, lone diners, and
friends.

RAINE
As if you haven't already read them all.
Save me the trouble. Anything
interesting?

Michelle looks bored, but warms up to Raine.

MICHELLE
Sadly, no. So tedious.

Raine plays along and sounds a bit flirtatious.

RAINE
So mundane.

They both reach across the table and clasp hands. They
look into each other's eyes and speak playfully.
Teasingly. Like teenagers.

MICHELLE
Pathetic little insects, really.

They start to play with each other's hands and fingers.

RAINE
No idea what they are missing.

Michelle is getting all pouty. Her and Raine start to
finish each other's sentences.

MICHELLE
I'd almost pity them except..

RAINE
..They're just not worth the trouble.

Michelle's focus is led astray behind Raine. Her eyes
widen as she notices the infomercial come onto a TV. In
the restaraunt. Raine sees the broadcast through
Michelle's mind, and his expression changes to a sour
one.

At the next table from Raine and Michelle are seated two
businessmen. One, Bob, is much younger than the other.
They have a boss, subordinate, relationship. Bob is
drinking from a cocktail glass while his boss is writing
in a day planner. As Bob sees the infomercial, he puts
his glass down and points up at it. He's talking to his
boss.

BOB
Oooh,oooh, have you seen this one?

His boss stops writing and turns around to look at the
TV. After a moment he replies.

BOSS
This commercial?
(Pause)
No.

Bob starts laughing at it in amusement.

BOB
It's hysterical. And it must be getting
popular if they're showing it during the
day now.

The boss turns back around to talk to Bob. Bob is still
watching the TV. But glances back and forth at his boss
while talking.

BOB (CONT'D)
Everybody's joking about it.

Bob makes a motion under his chin with both of his hands
to show an exaggerated girth.

BOB (CONT'D)
Jay Leno.

Bob pauses briefly as in thought.

BOB (CONT'D)
George Lopez. It's a video series all
about how to keep telepaths from stealing
your thoughts.

The boss looks incredulous at Bob.

BOSS
Telepaths? Seriously?

Bob nods and grabs a hold of his drink.

BOB
I know, right? That's what this guy is
selling anyway. I wish I would have
thought of it.

While Michelle and Raine are watching the two talking
with contempt, Bob leans in and raises his voice a bit.

BOB (CONT'D)
It's the biggest scam since the Snuggie.

Raine and Michelle glare at Bob for a second, then look
at each other knowingly. Michelle looks around the room
for a waiter. She sees one off to the left and signals
him over by snapping her fingers. The waiter takes notice
and proceeds immediately to their table. When he arrives
Michelle leans over and puts her hand to her mouth as if
she wants to tell him a secret. He bends down to hear
her, and she whispers into his ear.

Bob is finishing what's left in his glass. His boss is
looking very bored and unimpressed. Bob is still
commenting on the show with words of false interest while
the waiter arrives at his table.

BOB (CONT'D)
Wow.
(Pause)
Believe that?
(Pause)
Man.

The waiter places a small dish down in front of him with
a slice of pecan pie. Bob looks shocked and discontent
while staring down at the pie.

BOB (CONT'D)
Whoa! A telepath - this guy ain't!

Bob looks up at the waiter.

BOB (CONT'D)
I need another drink, not desert.

Bob looks back down at the pie a little more closely and
recoils. He again looks up at the waiter.

BOB (CONT'D)
Hey, you need to take that away.

The waiter is being very polite in spite of his
obnoxiousness.

WAITER
Is something the matter, sir?

Bob gets a bit excited.

BOB
Yeah, I'm allergic! I can't even be
around tree nuts!

The waiter takes his plate, and as he brings it up toward
Bob's face, Bob reels back in fear.

WAITER
My apologies, sir. Your friends at the
next table must not have been aware.

The waiter gestures over towards Michelle and then he
turns and leaves. Michelle waves her fingers at Bob and
smiles. Its a half-asses smile. Bob looks a little
nervous.

BOB
Sorry about that, folks. I'm not one to
turn down free food, but, well, you
heard.

Bob holds up his hand in a thank you gesture.

BOB (CONT'D)
I appreciate the gesture, though.

Michelle talks back to Bob straight-faced.

MICHELLE
My fault entirely.

Michelle speaks coyly.

MICHELLE (CONT'D)
No offense, I hope.

Bob is stricken with curiosity and gives Michelle an
inquisitive look.

BOB
None take. I'm just curious though; to
what do I owe the honor? I don't think
we've met.

Bob positions himself to get a better look at Michelle.

BOB (CONT'D)
I'm certain I would remember you.

Raine maneuvers into Bob's line of sight and inserts
himself into the conversation. He is smiling, but using
the same coy-tone as Michelle.

RAINE
It's just our way of introducing
ourselves.

Bob gets up and makes his way over to their table. He
walks up to Raine and extends his hand.

BOB'
Well then sir, its nice to meet you.
Name's Bob.

Raine ignores Bob and instead addresses his boss.

RAINE
Pardon my curiosity, but you haven't
noticed any discrepancies in Bob's
department lately, have you?

Bob flinches and retracts his hand. He looks over at his
boss while he speaks.

BOSS
(Slowly)
No...

Raine rather cockily, engages his boss more.

RAINE
Well, Bob here just bought a new boat,
right? He's always bragging that up.
Weekends at the lake, drinking beer from
the can, bigger fish and bigger lies.

Raine gives a fake sigh.

RAINE (CONT'D)
Any of this sound familiar?

The boss nods knowingly. His gazed is fixated on a far
off no-place while he thinks about what Raine has just
said. Bob is anxious.

BOB
Hey, slow down there partner. You with
the IRS or something?

Bob laughs nervously while waiting for a response from
Raine. Raine is still ignoring Bob.

RAINE
Bob here isn't exactly your best man, is
he? And he certainly hasn't earned a
raise.

Bob cuts into Raine's conversation at the last word. He
is now very nervous and trying desperately to change the
subject.

BOB
All right, enough small talk. It's my
turn to buy! Waiter!

Bob desperately looks around for a waiter. Then back at
Raine.

BOB (CONT'D)
What are you guys drinking?

Michelle holds up her mineral water bottle and smirks at
Bob contemptuously while shaking it just a little from
side to side. Raine is still talking to the boss.

RAINE
So not to tell you how to run your
business, but if I were you, I know which
department I would be auditing next.

Raine tries to sound forward and convincing.

RAINE (CONT'D)
And I mean right after this charming
little get together is over.

Raine rises from his seat to leave and Michelle follows.
They don't look at either Bob or his boss as they gather
their things. The boss is staring at Bob piercingly while
he processes all this information. Bob is visibly
sweating and shaking, staring into his cocktail glass as
if hoping to make another drink appear with his will
power alone. As Michelle passes by Bob she leans over to
him to speak. Bob looks up at her pleadingly. His eyes
are asking 'why' and 'how'.

MICHELLE
Think about it, Bob. You can figure it
out. Best of luck in the unemployment
line.

Raine and Michelle exit the restaraunt. As they cross the
threshold, Bob realizes that they were telepaths. A
revelation dawns upon his sad face. And he looks intently
at the closing door.



INT. HOSPICE - EVENING

Poppy is walking down the corridor alone. She is wearing
a jacket over her scrubs. The halls are deserted except
for her. She is texting while walking. As the scene comes
into view, she finishes. Her phone gives a 'message sent'
beep. She puts her phone away into one of her pockets. As
she does so, she notices that she is right in front of
room 17. She stops and stares at the door. She's tempted.
She bites on her lip and looks around. She looks down the
right side of her, down the hallway. Then the left side.
There is nobody around. She quietly opens the door, and
steps in. She closes it behind her.

POPPY
Hello?

The room is dimly lit. We can barely see some chairs and
a counter. A couple end tables. There's a large curtain
surrounding a bed to the right of the door. Poppy
approaches the edge of the curtain as carefully as
possible.
She slowly peels back the curtain gingerly, and peeks at
its contents. Poppy leans her head into the void of
blackness that surrounds the inner sanctum of the
curtain.

In the distance we can hear high-heels clicking and
clacking on the hall's floor. They are moving at a fast
pace. The sound gets louder and louder, until it finally
reaches the doorway. Poppy drops the curtain, and bites
her lip. The sound then begin to dissipate. It gets
softer as it continues to move on down the hallway. It
eventually gets quiet again. Poppy exhales gratefully,
counts to ten silently. She mouths every number. Poppy
then opens the door quietly and peeks her head out. She
looks both ways down the hall. There is nobody there. She
leaves as silently as possible, shutting the door softly
behind her.

Poppy is thinking to herself as the door latches shut.

POPPY (CONT'D)
(Voice Over)
Okay, I'm officially the next passenger
on the curiosity express. Who the heck is
that?

Poppy takes a look at the door one last time, then walks
down the hallway. She's breathing heavily, clearly
stressed, and a bit scared.



INT. BAR - EVENING
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